Today has consisted of going for a run and getting blisters on both of my feet, scrubbing and flossing my teeth to the best of my ability only to go to the dentist and find out I was a week early for my appointment, eating 10 mini Reese cups and two flat pickles (this is not all I’ve eaten today, just a sampling and no, I’m not pregnant), spending a few minutes pondering the part in my hair and online house hunting.

I’ve written about the tricky language and pictures that sellers and realtors post online: “skylight” actually means gaping hole in the ceiling.  What I haven’t shared is the ULCER that I think may be growing in my stomach with the intent of taking over my entire body.  I am an ulcer.  I am an ulcer because The Hubbs and I are new home buyers.  And yes, it’s a “buyer’s market.” Sweet!  Wait, what exactly does that mean?  Houses are selling for much cheaper prices than a few years ago.  Awesome.  We can get more house for our money.  BUT we have to put money down.  Mmmmkay.  And, there’s this other stuff called “closing costs” and “associated fees.”   And that’s just the money stress. 

Then there’s the actual house.  I love houses.  I love picturing my furniture in living spaces and my clothes in closets.  I really enjoy walking through a potential home with The Hubbs and hear him say things like “This could be a kid’s room.” AHHHHHH! A kid’s room.  He’s thinking about our hypothetical children.  I’ve named them Jackson and Adeline, “Addie” for short.  I’m ready to pull out my painter’s tape when I realize it might be a good idea to make sure the bathrooms have toilets and, oh, they don’t.  Damnit.  How close is the house to the railroad tracks?  In the backyard?  No, thanks.  Why are they clearing the land behind this house?  A shopping center?  No, thanks.  Oh, the neighbors raise pot-bellied pigs.  No, thanks.  Above ground pool and the seller’s collection of “slightly used” porn magazines convey.  No, thanks. 

Have I  mentioned the $8000 tax credit that EXPIRES NOV. 30TH?  Ulcer.

We have an appointment this Saturday to view some new houses.  I will try to overlook the cave that is actually a living room covered in wood paneling, the built in pink china cabinet and the floor covering, which is loosely being referred to as carpet.  Wish us luck!

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